


health and safety

by kellifer_fic



Series: Darcy ficlets [1]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Domestic, F/M, health and safety, will be adding to these as i go
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-19
Updated: 2016-01-19
Packaged: 2018-05-14 21:30:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 478
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5759551
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kellifer_fic/pseuds/kellifer_fic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Don't you <i>babe</i> me," Darcy says icily. "Is this the kind of thing you deal with all the time?"</p>
            </blockquote>





	health and safety

**Author's Note:**

  * For [LariaGwyn](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LariaGwyn/gifts).



"Giant... thing. It's a giant thing!" Darcy yells into the comms and hears the tell-tale silence that means every single member of the Avengers is judging her. 

Finally Clint, because he's always the one relegated to Darcy-duty and yes, she knows why and yes, it's frustrating slash understandable, clears his throat and says, "Um, could you maybe, elaborate?"

Darcy cuts a glare side-wise at Phil, because this is _all his fault_. His face is inscrutable as always, but she can just tell he's snickering to himself on the inside. He was the one that, up until that year, had been forced to do a field review of the Avengers' Health and Safety practices. The point was a little moot considering there was no real way to make their jobs any safer, but they were required by SHIELD HR to give it a red-hot go anyway.

Or _Phil_ was, until he palmed the duty off on Darcy.

"You want me to _elaborate_?" Darcy says very calmly, she thinks, through her teeth. HR had had the bright idea that there should be a visual recon of threats before the team was sent in so they could best plan an approach. It was one of their _initiatives_ and it sucked, basically.

"Babe-"

"Don't you _babe_ me," Darcy says icily. "Is this the kind of thing you deal with all the time?"

"Uh-oh," she hears and thinks it might be Tony throwing in his two cents. 

Darcy is understandably upset, because she's been _lied_ to. The whole alien invasion of New York was one thing, but Clint has basically been down-playing the kinds of stuff they'd been dealing with ever since. 

"It's all PR, you said," Darcy continues, warming up to her rant. She sees Phil shuffle his wheelie chair away from her a little, eyes going tight in as close an approximation of a wince as he's ever likely to make. "Basically rescuing kittens from trees, you _said_."

"It usually is," Clint defends, and his voice goes high and reedy and that's his tell. He knows the incriminating pitch of his voice made it over the comms because he clears his throat and says in a much deeper voice that even Thor would be proud of, "It's usually nothing like this."

"Like the giant purple blob eating a building you mean?" Darcy demands and she hears Steve huff out a, "Finally," because he's totally Captain America and everything that goes with that, but he's also sometimes an impatient douche and Darcy loves both facets of his personality equally.

"We're going in," Steve announces in a more normal tone over the public channel.

"I don't think this is what HR were going for," Phil says dryly.

"HR can bite my butt," Darcy grumbles and Clint _might_ just be forgiven because he blurts, also over the public channel, "Wow, I love you."

Might.

**Author's Note:**

> Come say hi on [tumblr](http://kellifer-k.tumblr.com/) or [twitter](https://twitter.com/kellifer_podfic)


End file.
